Toilets, New Orleans, Video games, Linux, PostgreSQL, the Marigny, Restaurants, Live Music, Bars, Hollywood Hotties and all with 30% less fat!!

Home

What's New

Tell me that you love me!!

Feedback / Submit Reader Photos

PGDesigner Datamodeling Tool

PGDesigner

The Greatest Game of all TIME!!

Cylindrix

Links

Personal

Links:

Watch Me Eat a Hot Dog

www.glitch13.com

Live New Orleans

Yaddoshi's site

Six Ten Split

Fleshbot

Offbeat

Go to Misc Stuff Page: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46

Misc Stuff

This is a page for anything that comes to my mind

2010-01-17: Blue Foo

9:18 PM on Sunday night. 2010 in the Year of Our Lord. The Saints are going to the NFC Championship next week against the Vikings. There are people trapped under rubble in Haiti. This week there is an election for a hotly contested Senate seat that may destroy the Health Care Bill.

The Jets Beat the Chargers. Next week I would expect to see the Saints vs. the Colts to be the Headline of the Day.

Two Thousand Ten. Twenty Ten, more succinctly. After Two Thousand One Hundred and Twenty Three people may just start saying "Twenty Thirty Three." I'm starting now. Twenty Ten. How low will my shriveled balls be sagging in Twenty Thirty Three? Will there be cosmetic ball-surgery to supplement the Viagra and Cialis? Shiva, I hope so.

But rewinding from 2033 we find ourselves here in the swamp. No longer a child, no longer a pissed-off teenager, no longer the Rock-N-Roller, no longer the early-20s programmer protege, no longer even the late 20s Street-Rat.

And God this stuff is getting monotonous. I will rhyme now.

For the first month I can find no rhymes
So I use November and pause in time
We endured this bleak December and now we climb
To the Final Game in which we'll shine
On Brees and Peyton, on Colston and Sharper,
On Bush and Shockey, Blitzen and Donner,
On Fujita and Bell, and Thomas and Greer,
I love you as much as a Red Nosed Reindeer.

Permalink to this post.

2010-01-16: Finnish Him!

OK, so I got amazingly lazy here. I just jotted this one down and didn't worry about whether it looked like a turd.

Saints are going to the NFC Championship.

I think we'll win. And then it's Superbowl time. Holy poop.

We are talking about New Orleans here. New Orleans goes freaking apeshit for random uncelebrated holidays. New Orleans decides to spontaneously go batshit awesome for mediocre events.

Saints in the fucking Superbowl?

I don't even want to be in Miami. New Orleans will be the true madness.

Permalink to this post.

2010-01-15: Coffee Like Women

OK this one is out there. It was funny in my head. This was actually the first comic I thought of after the very first "Taco Humping" comic I drew. I just couldn't figure out a way to draw a visual of a coffee woman.

So I stewed and stewed. When I told Donald the joke verbally he thought it was pretty funny, but he said, "How in the hell are you going to draw a woman made out of coffee?"

And here we are.

So I figured I'd add the "coffee golem" text to help a little with the joke. And I find myself committing the mortal sin: Explaining my joke with text.

What's really horrid is just how bad I am at drawing. When I started I was so freaking proud of what I had learned about perspective. Then I looked at the final result and it was like a light fart noise.

So, it is incredibly difficult to be even moderately interesting without pissing off 80% of the hardgeus.com reading public. I could pitter and patter and talk about coffee-comics. I could zing and zang, but what I would really like to talk about is Haiti.

And immediately alienate virtually all of my viewership with my utterly bleak view.

Even the allusion is almost too much. How many sexy quarter girls have now hit the ignore button? (Is there an ignore button?)

I am forced to self-censor. Always and forever. The vitriolic vitriol that flows from my tongue disgusts everyone around me.

But this is insane drunk talk.

Tomorrow will be a day to remember. Not only will the Saints be playing in a huge playoff game, but this will also be a precursor to an epic battle between the frighteningly awesome Cowboys and the Farve-Laden and dangerous Vikings. Before the Saints even hit the field they will be threatened with the beast that they will have to face. Whether it be the Catastrophic Cowboys or the Vociferous Vikings, it will be a battle to fear.

This shit is so exciting that even my Goth Friends are shouting "Geaux Saints!"

And that, indeed, is a sight to behold

Postscriptum:

Be sure to re-read everything you write. Over and over. I have fixed about 15 embarrassing errors in this turd-spew alone. You would be amazed at how stupid you sound if you do not revise your words.

Permalink to this post.

2010-01-10: Detective Drama.

There is a whole Horatio Meme running around the Internet. Tracey thinks that Horatio is silly, but I think he makes that show. I sit there and watch, just waiting for Horatio to shoot out a one-liner.

It's kind of like watching Rocky Horror Picture Show. It's so bad it's good. I'm 100% certain that the writers of that show know exactly how cheesy it is. I think that they are intentionally going over the top and making it so bad that it's awesome.

Anybody that is too in love with their dogs makes them dance and makes up silly voices for them. Whenever CSI Miami comes on, I pick up Taco and make her sing the Horatio song:

"Horatio!!!!!!!!!!"
(Bam-de-bam-de-bam)
"Horatio!!!!!!!!!!"
(Bam-de-bam-de-bam)
"Kickin' fuckin' ass yeah! Horatio! Saying funny shit yeah!"

Permalink to this post.

2010-01-09: Why so Basement?

This one isn't very topical. Hopefully you remember the iconic and evil picture of Josef Fritzl. If not, hopefully the punchline text at least gives an idea of what is going on.

Permalink to this post.

Go to Misc Stuff Page: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46