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Misc Stuff

This is a page for anything that comes to my mind

2004-03-01: Calling all drinkers!

I have just gotten one of my thrice-yearly bursts of energy and inspiration and I have yet another hair brained scheme. It's all hush-hush, but I'll tell you if you buy me a drink.

Anyway, what I need from you, the drinkers, is the following:

Face photos of New Orleans bartenders along with their first and last names, as well as the name of the bar where they work.

You can either email me these, or if you have an image host just leave a comment here with the reference. You can email me at:

nospam at hardgeus.com

Of course, replace " at " with @

Anyway, below is the list of bars whose information I am particularly interested in compiling:

Bud Rip's, The Friendly Bar, Mimi's, DBA, Spotted Cat, Blue Nile, Cafe Brasil, The Dragon's Den, The R Bar, The John, Checkpoint Charlie's, The Metro, Aunt Tiki's, The Whirling Dervish, The Abbey, Molly's, Club 735, Jean Lafitte's Blacksmith, Fiorella's, Flanagan's, Pat O's, Pirate's Alley, Razoo, Utopia, La Fee Verte, Deep South, Alibi, Circle Bar, Howling Wolf, Lucy's, The Saint, The Balcony, Miss May's, Snake and Jakes, The Bulldog, The Maple Leaf, Pal's, Nick's, Parlay's, St. Joe's, The Mayfair, The Red Eye, Carollton Station, Butler's, Rock 'N Bowl, Rivershack, F & M, Half Moon

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2004-01-14: When I was a Hippie...

When I was a hippie I fell deeply and desperately in love with women at a frantic pace. I became completely consumed by them. I thought that I could never live my life without their smell, their sound, their face. I thought that the world would end if they were not in my life.

Of course, it didn't.

In those days I would paint a painting of a girl I had just met. I would write a hundred pages about her. I would fall in love with the mere idea of her. I would drive two hours to see her after meeting her at a rock show. I would write her songs. I would give her anything. In her were all of the hopes and dreams I could ever have. All I wanted was for this girl to be HER.

Twelve years ago was a blink of an eye. I can still see this day with complete clarity. I can still smell her clove cigarettes. I still remember the things she wrote. I remember Jim Rose's circus that we watched together. I remember everything.

As rapidly as I fell in love, I fell into pain. I learned the meaning of betrayal. I watched the girl who deflowered me proceed to throw her flower to everyone in my band. I had girls laugh in my face. I sat by a girl after her surgery only to have her ask me to fix her up with my bass player. (Note to self: writing songs for girls creeps them out). This and a hundred other Poor-Old_John tales. Poor me indeed.

So we fast forward to today. My heart is a twisted piece of gristle. It takes a herculean effort to access it, and when you do it is often covered in bile and assorted other unpleasantries.

But, I have to remember that I am Leonard Shelby (Memento). We all lie to ourselves to make ourselves happy. I am also Fred Madison (Lost Highway). I like to remember things my way. Not how they happened. I have to remember that I have been the bad guy on more than one occasion. More than likely on exactly the occasions where I feel the most wronged.

Damn, this life shit is hard.

Editor's Note: The girl in this picture never did anything bad to me :)

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2003-11-11: Ensign of Natchez

Another road trip kiddies.

Every time I go to Natchez, it seems that my complimentary room is slightly less palatial. However there are still 7 or 8 gradations of quality to go before I am in a regular room. I mean I'm picking nits about the size of the Jacuzzi tub for God's sake. I can see how rich people get so snooty.

To the left you can see the sweet bathrobes provided with the room. Before I got to Natzhez I looked up the weather, and 55 degrees didn't seem that cold so I didn't bring a jacket. I am a moron. The bathrobes were a lifesaver. They were thick enough to serve as an overcoat. This was necessary, as Tracey goes outside to smoke about once every three minutes.

I took some pictures of Natchez. I took a bunch, but they were mostly of interest to me. (Like the one here) I posted just the touristy pictures at the link. The first picture is "the Castle" at Dunleith Plantation where I was doing computer work. The castle was originally built to house the carriages and horses for the inhabitants of the plantation. One interesting thing: look closely at the picture of the garden. It is in the shape of the emblem on the British flag. Pretty cool. Also pay close attention to the last picture. I got a good shot of a horse's butthole.

It can be hard for a New Orleans native to appreciate Natchez, because the architecture is so similar. We see it every day. However, if you look at Natchez in the context of most cities in America, you can really appreciate how different it is. It's also nice to see the architecture without having to deflect panhandlers.

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2003-11-03: That's right! I AM the Pumpkin King!

And I just can't wait until next Halloween because I've got some new ideas that'll really make them scream.

Another Halloween came and went. Another year older and stinkier sweat.

Halloween was madness. It is official: Frenchman street is Bourbon Jr. In a 15 minute span the area in front of DBA went from crowded to unnavigable. Normally I would have been unable to see anything, but being in 7 inch heels was pretty sweet. I could see everything.

Note to self: When you want to attract girls, dress in drag. Now I know that this is completely counter-intuitive. It defies logic and reason. But I tell you, self, it works.

Note Two: Tracey should dye her hair pink. It is becoming. I told her this, and she countered that I should dress in drag to work. Touche'.

Note Three: Just because you can competently walk in 7 inch heels at the beginning of the night is no reason to believe you can do so after 4 hours of Halloween drinking and quarter walking. My right toes are still numb. I have bruised ankles. My drag shoes are scraped and in need of hot glue to reaffix the top to the bottom. My already considerable respect for transvestites has been increased a thousandfold after wearing those shoes. Respect to the queens.

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2003-10-27: Ha-Ha-Halloween

I was going to wait to post these pictures until after Halloween, but it has been quite a while since I have updated, and I really don't have anything else to put up.

Pictured to the left is myself and Tracey dressed up as Frank-N-Furter and Columbia from Rocky Horror Picture show. This picture was taken at Cuong's Party.

One thing I learned: Being tall is really fun. People pay attention to you. Of course, being in drag probably did a lot to draw attention, but many people noted my height. My height came from wearing platform drag shoes with 5 inch heels. I walked surprisingly well in them. Note that Tracey is 5'9 and is wearing heels in the picture, so you can infer my height.

I am looking forward to this Halloween. Halloween is my favorite holiday. This will be my first official holiday in my new house, (well, there was decadence fest...) and I expect a blast. There is no point in making real Halloween plans in New Orleans. Simply walking around outside is an adventure in and of itself. This is why Cuong scheduled his party a week before.

I will be sure to get many fine pictures of the Holiday and post them here for you. Stay tuned.

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