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Misc Stuff

This is a page for anything that comes to my mind

2002-02-14: My Old Writing

I have a tattered brown binder with hundreds of pages of my old writing. It spans from about when I was 15 to about 18. I recently started reading it after years of neglect, and I have been surprised by just how much stuff I wrote. At the time I thought it was the most profound writing imaginable, but now a lot of it just seems like goth poetry. And I wasn't even goth. There are, however, some gems that I really love. There is this one "poem" (can't really call it that...) that has really stuck with me, and the first line plays through my head more often than the image of Britney Spears with the snake - which is to say quite a bit. So here it is:

I had a dream last night of men with exploding heads
And crooked penises pointing towards the sun
They were all drawn upon a papyrus scroll, all identical
All with the same intense mystery. Hundreds of them
I turned and grasped continuations of the scroll,
There was a different symbol on every sheet
I read the heiroglyphics, my mind filled with arcane knowledge
Which I no longer remember and I saw
My dog, frozen in formaldehyde with metal about her face
And I knew
All is reality

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2002-01-30: 225 and dropping baby!

Forty pounds. (40 pounds). As in 35 + 5.

I am working on my guide to swoll, so keep tuned in for that! It is full of wonderful advice on how to lose weight such as "Put a mirror by your treadmill so you can see your hideous body bounce while you're jogging"

I am now only 5 pounds away from my 5 year low. That's right, kids, I haven't cracked 220 since I was 21. I MAY have hit 215 for a week or two, but for the most part I've been above 230 for quite a while. I have realized something, though. I am a lot fatter than I thought. Last time I got down to 220 I thought I was Tom Cruise. I was not. Aside from not being gay, I am also fat.

I'm going to de-intensify my regimen once I hit 220 (which was my initial goal), but I'm going to try to make it down below 200. If I can make it below 200 I will be sailing waters uncharted since I was 18. That's right, kids...I've been in the deuce club since I turned 19.

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2001-12-27: Anubis

This canvas killed my painting hobby. One defining aspect of my personality is a tendency to bite off far more than I can chew. There are many many examples of this trait affecting my life. Overall, though, I am glad that I have it. Without a complete disregard for my limitations I never would have written Cylindrix, gotten my first or current programming job, or written a C interpreter.

On the other hand, I have failed miserably at some tasks I still can't believe I tried. When I was 17 and decided to get back into computers after a long stint at music, I was convinced that I could turn my Commodore 64 into a 486 using parts from Radio Shack. I'm not joking. And of course, me not being McGuyver or Dexter, the results were both a broken Commodore 64 and ego.

This painting is also an example. It may not be obvious from the photo, but this canvas is 8 feet by 4 feet. Not only was it around my fifth painting ever, but it was also my first attempt at airbrushing, my previous ones being oil or acrylic. Obviously, I never finished the painting. I stopped working on this painting about six or seven years ago, and that was the last time I painted. Every time I want to paint, this unfinished spectre haunts me. I am too stubborn to allow myself an easier painting. It's either finish this beast or nothing. And so it sits, waiting for me to drink too much coffee one day and obsess on it for the months it will take to finish.

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2001-12-17: Disco John

I just thought I looked Disco Money (TM) in this shot, so here it is. Here I am seen dancing with one of my dance teachers at our school's disco party. As you can clearly see, she's not so hard on the eyes. Unfortunately I didn't have any shots of her face, but I assure you that there are no Bugs Bunny style surprises.

I am now a yellow belt swing dancer. I can't wait until I get up to brown and we start breaking boards with our rock step spin kick. My teacher can cha cha through a cinderblock, but I've heard that this isn't really that hard.

We also had a Christmas party last week that was really cool. We all got together, drank some drinks, and danced the night away. Every 45 minutes or so one of the advanced students would put on a showcase of some of the more advanced moves in ballroom dancing. I gave a standing ovation to a 3 year student's Waltz and Nunchaku performance, it was incredible.

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2001-12-09: So Close to Almost Not Fat

242 and counting. Now to you 242 may seem pretty damn fat. But for me, who topped out at 265, 242 is almost svelte. The lightest I have been in 5 years is 215, and I was quite strapping at that weight. My current goal is 220 because I've put on too much muscle from working out to get back to 215.

On a somber note Carmen and I have broken up. This may seem like an odd thing to broadcast on my website, but most of the people that read this site are friends that I don't talk to very often due to geographical separation. It's a painful thing because she and I have been together for almost 2 years, but it was for the best...we've been on the verge of breaking up pretty much weekly since meeting.

Also, I think I've gotten my first legitimate semi-angry feedback message. I've gotten several angry emails in the past but they all had the telltale signs of my friends' pranks. This one was just girlie enough to be a real live artsy liberal girl. Actually, it was a bit more sarcastic than angry...but it was close enough to make me feel popular :)

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