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Toilets

2002-10-08: The Whirling Dervish

The Whirling Dervish used to be the Crystal. The Crystal was pretty much goth central back in the day, as you can tell from this picture. These days I'm not sure what you'd call the crowd. Few of these people are goth anymore, but they are definitely of the "voodoo darkness" variety. Not that this is a bad thing, because I certainly love looking at interesting things.

I think this place is stealing some of the Shim Sham's thunder, however. Some of the former staples of Shim-Sham life have migrated to the Whirling Dervish. I try to go to the Shim Sham every night that I visit the Whirling Dervish out of some sense of perverse obligation, but the Whirling Dervish is starting to overtake it from the inside lane. It doesn't help that the Shim Sham seems to be pulling in more and more people that just don't seem to belong there.

I must admit that I kind of cheated on this picture. Normally I take pictures during peak business hours (which, for New Orleans, is between 1 and 3 AM). People don't show up to these bars until 11:30. I was there at 9:00 and was virtually the only person there. So I took this picture with almost no risk of being caught. I wasn't going to tell you but I just felt too guilty. I am sorry for my weakness, dear reader.

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2001-11-20: St. Joe's

St. Joes has the perfect combination for those introspective nights: Low noise level and cheap drinks. Add to that the Chinese motif in the outdoor patio and you've got a winner.

Of course no outing would be complete without 10 trips to the facilities. And if you're a regular at the trough (see earlier post) like I am, you've no doubt noticed that they often double as ice disposal units.

Which makes me wonder...why exactly do you need to dispose of large quantities of ice? Does it stick together if you leave it too long? Does it get nasty and full of beer? Does it overflow? I worked in fast food for years and I don't ever remember throwing out ice except for the one time I broke a glass in it.

I've always found pissing on ice a little odd...I get creeped out watching the ice melt. I don't know why. The only thing worse is pissing on someone else's shit. One of my friends (not going to say who) confessed to me that he found great entertainment in using his urine stream to move around and break up shit in the toilet. To each his own.

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2003-01-26: St. Joe's Redux - The Other Side

The toilets are a hit. The bulk of my feedback can be divided into two categories. The "Mila and Fairuza are hot" category, and the "I love your toilets page" cagegory. The toilet feedback is mostly from people I know, and the "Mila" feedback is mostly from people who found me from a Google search for Mila.

So far I have been disproportionately representing men's bathrooms. For obvious reasons. It is rather difficult for one with my chromosomal makeup to get away with taking photos in a women's bathroom. Nevertheless, I often get requests for the women's bathroom. Girls frequenty spin yarns about how cool the women's bathroom is at bars X, Y, and Z. The grass is always greener.

This photo is proof. Look at that coolness! This is the women's room at St. Joes. Contrast and compare with the men's room at the same bar. The difference is stark.

My friend Carrie convinced me to get this shot. She told me the women's room was cool, and she was right. I braved many perils for this photo, my friends. In fact, I was busted. Or should I say, we were busted. A girl walked into the bathroom and there we stood. Carrie there in the bathroom with me, and me with a camera in my hand. It was quite an embarassing moment. That is how dedicated I am to bringing quality photos for you to view.

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2001-11-24: The Mayfair

I've never really been too keen on Uptown New Orleans. I don't know why. Maybe I'm still not over my high school prejudices against preps and frats. Looking at me you'd think I fit right in with the high fiving white guys, but I'm actually more comfortable with the freaks at the Shim Sham. Of course, the freaks think I'm a prep that's wandered into their habitat for some slumming, but I don't care.

The Mayfair is right next to the Superior Grill. I went there this Wednesday because they had 2$ Abita and a million people. After spending about 40$ on 2$ Abitas (you do the math...but don't forget tips for the beer girl) I needed to use the facilities. It literally took me 30 minutes to get into the bathroom at the Superior Grill, and since I was surrounded by 10 guys I was too embarassed to take a picture.

Later that night we stopped by the Mayfair. The Mayfair is hella small. If you go there when it's crowded be prepared to smell everyone there, because that's how close you'll be to them. However, it does have unique decorations. I can't remember what they were, but I know they were cool.

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2001-10-03: Shim Sham

Here's some grafitti on the wall of the Shim Sham
"cocktail bar" on Toulouse. It seems the be the new "gothy" place
for people to hang out. I kind of like the living room atmosphere of
the upstairs. Unfortunately now that my prep ass is showing up there
the cool people will probably find some other place to wear their
capes.

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